If you need something immediately just start getting used to doing shit like peeling and boiling your own potatoes, cooking simple pieces of meat like steak or chicken breast and figuring out what vegetables you like.
Vegetables are usually easy to make in the microwave, on 900 watt about 4-6 minutes depending on how tough the vegetable is, just chop it, throw it in a bowl with some water and salt and nuke it.

If you want more complicated stuff to learn, start by doing some basic recipes a couple of times, making a red pasta sauce, a simple curry, a meatloaf, just google a couple recipes on google and start experimenting.

>>397
Thanks anon, never knew you could microwave veggies that isn't frozen. The only thing that bugs me is the idea of buying things to help me cook. Like cooking tools/utensils , or certain spices/ingredients to help make a meal. For some weird reason it turns me off, but I'm fine with just buying fast food from Taco Bell or some Chinese place. I feel it costs me more to buy these ingredients then going out to eat. Even though I feel this isn't the case in the long run.

>>398
It's much cheaper to just cook yourself, a bag of potato's is pretty cheap, and pasta and rice is practically free at the prices you can get it at, that's the carbs part of your meal already sorted.
If you're just cooking for yourself I like getting vegetables you can split up into several days, a fresh cauliflower or broccoli for instance you can just keep tearing parts off over several days while it still stays pretty fresh in your fridge. A broccoli gives you vegetables for your meal for 2-3 days, I don't know where you live but I'm sure one of those can't cost more then 1-2$.
Meat is the priciest part of your meal, I usually aim for at least 200 grams for a meal, which is usually easily doable for under 3$, and for meat in sauces like red pasta sauce or meatballs you can usually get it much cheaper since you can get ground beef/pork. If you're more of a fan of something like chicken, getting a whole chicken is often pretty good value too.

Spices are incredibly cheap, or at least the dried variety is, which is fine for almost anything. Give yourself a monthly budget of 5$ for spices and you'll have a massive collection like any sensible /ck/ user in no time.

>>396
When I was pleb, first thing I did was cook cuts of meat on the grill or over the stove and heated up canned veggies, trying out different seasonings until I knew what I liked. Next, I worked in fresh veggies until I was used to cooking them. Then I had the basics down and I got creative from there.
>>398
All you need is a good pan to cook in, cooking oil, and a single shaker of whatever spice you like best. Try starting with one of those spice mixes, or just plain cumin goes well with almost anything. Then, add to your collection one at a time. Whenever you go out to restock on vegetables and meat, buy one spice shaker or sauce or cooking wine until you have a collection. Trying these things out individually will also help you learn how the affect the food you cook and you can develop personal recipes based on your personal tastes.

Considering a take-out meal can be $9-20 and I can get two weeks or more's worth of home-cooked meals with less than $30, take-out is always more expensive. Ration out the meat you buy. Use a quarter of an onion and put the rest in the fridge. If cooking for yourself, you can get two meals out of a zucchini, three meals out of a good-seized eggplant, about 3 weeks out of a garlic clove. Two cups of rice will feed you all week. Invest in good tupperware and freezer bags.

>>396
Start by learning how to make scrambled eggs. They're easy to make and hard to mess up. Just keep them moving and don't use too high of a heat setting.

>>402
I should mention how to scramble eggs I guess. Get a cup and crack your eggs into it (two at a time is most common). Don't worry much about learning how to crack shells at first you'll mess that up until you figure it out. I tap it twice on the container I'm using and pull them apart. Anyway, get a fork and beat the eggs until you have the yoke mixed in with the white. It'll look like a uniform yellow liquid. From there you can add cheese (shredded cheddar is what I use), a bit of pepper, and a splash of milk if you like them fluffy. Get a skillet on the burner at about medium heat. Pour your eggs in the skillet. When they start getting good heat the bottom will start getting solid. Use your spatula to push them around to keep any part of the eggs from burning/getting over cooked. Once the bottom is pretty solid you can flip the whole thing and cook the other side. Just keep them moving constantly and use the spatula to break the eggs up into smaller pieces. They'll finish pretty quickly.

Clean your skillet right away. It'll clean up much easier if you do it right away. Just run water in the skillet and wipe it clean with a towel.
If you cook bacon in the skillet first drain the grease before cooking eggs. Leave a little bit in the skillet to mix in with the eggs for taste. By a little I mean just what's left in the skillet after draining it. Drain the grease into a cup or similar container. Do not pour it down a sink drain dispose of it in the trash or save it to make gravy

>>403
>>400
>>399
Thanks anons. Actually tried to cook spegetti with meatbalks and it turned out shit, but I learned from it so shouldn't mess I next time.

>>405
A much easier way of doing the same sort of idea as spaghetti and meatballs but much simpler is bolognese sauce.
There's a basic recipe here: http://www.foodnetwork.co.uk/recipes/simple-bolognese.html but it allows for a lot of creativity, for instance I prefer paprika over celery and will usually add rosemary, thyme and dried laurel leaves for a more complex flavor.
I will usually also start off the baking with just the onion and minced meat, add the garlic later since it overcooks much easier then onion.
It's also one of those recipes that becomes tastier the longer the spices have time to spread, so great for making for a couple days and just keep reheating it, adding a little water if it becomes too dry.

Always serve it with a bit of garnishing, cheese is a must but adding fresh parsley, basil or basil pesto also works great.

>>405
Don't be afraid to eat a lot of shit. Crunchy lentils, raw chicken that needs to be nuked. It's only natural to do things wrong as you learn. Don't get discouraged by a few bad dinners.

Rule of thumb for boxed pasta is to boil it until it starts to float (or just time it for around 8 minutes).
A trick for meatballs: throw the raw ball of meat right into the sauce and cook it in the sauce.

My personal recommendation is to start off with simple dishes that don't take so many ingredients. Start out too complicated and you'll end up throwing half of everything away.

So I'll recommend these things:

Oven-Roasted Veggies:
While fresh veggies are better, there's no shame in eating frozen ones. Unless you know what you're going to make, have a few bags of frozen veggies in the freezer.

Take a glass baking tray, add 1 tsp of olive oil, and spread it evenly on the tray with a small piece of paper towel. Add chopped veggies of your choice. I like to do a mix of brussel sprouts, potatos, and onions. Add salt, pepper, and other seasonings to your taste. Rosemary goes well with potatos, as does garlic and hot pepper. Bake approximately 20 minutes at 350, maybe more or less depending on your choice of veggies.

-Oven Roasted Chicken breast.
Pick up some chicken breasts on sale at your local grocery. Prepare your glass baking tray with olive oil. If you like, now is an acceptable time to add some buffalo sauce or other preferred marinade, along with spices.

Toss into the oven at 400 degrees for 20 minutes. Take one out, cut it open, and see if its pink inside. If it is, throw it back in, if not, either eat that breast, cube it, or pull it apart and save it for later.
Take the prepared chicken breasts you're not going to eat and store them in ziplock bags and freeze them, or in glass tupperware and toss them in your fridge. Serve with roasted veggies, slice it up for a salad, fajitas or burritos, etc.

Basic pizza recipe. Good option if mozzarella bricks are on sale. Buy those frozen pizza dough balls in your bakery section, a block of mozzerella, some tomato sauce or pizza sauce, and some jarred diced garlic.

Now just follow the directions on the doughball, but the secret is you can just use your glass baking tray instead of a pizza stone. The key here is to make sure your oven is preheated to 450F beforehand or it will stick. Add whatever toppings you like. That roasted chicken is a pretty good option.

None of these are Michelin Star tier recipes, but they're simple enough that you shouldn't get overwhelmed or throw out half your ingredients.

Also don't be afraid to use a lot of partially prepared food when you're first starting out.

Stuff like boxed pasta, premade pizza dough, or frozen veggies aren't as good as fresh homemmade stuff, but for a beginner cook the biggest barrier can just be getting your ass off the couch or managing prepwork.

>>416
In the case of pizza dough, making it yourself is extremely easy and usually tastier, takes a bit of work kneading it together but you only need flour, water, olive oil, salt and some yeast, and dried yeast is extremely cheap and will hold for years in storage.

>>417
Sometimes I don't even use yeast in dough, just flour, olive oil, and water.

>>419
>>417
Its not hard, but frozen dough is a nice (unintimidating) intermediary step between buying diogiorno or those premade pizza shells.

>>418
I like it better cooked in the sauce. It comes out less dry.

>>419
Oh yeah that usually works fine as long as you go for a nice thin rome style crust, or if you want a thicker more fluffy product you can also use baking soda, I think that's what they normally use in thick american style crusts as well.
>>422
Your meatballs shouldn't be drying out from being in sauce, are you not mixing your minced meat with some egg and flour to create a fluffier texture?

Op just make a simple dinner to start off.

>Peel potatoes and put them cut up into boiling water (add a pinch of salt).
>Put frozen vegetables into another pan of (salted) boiling water
>Let cook for 20-25 minutes stabbing with a force to test softness
>Put chicken breast in oven and bake for 20 minutes

That's it you're done. Super simple and easy. Most vegetables take about the same time to boil so once you get comfortable with that you can branch out to more dishes. Once you can boil potatoes and bake a chicken boil some tatoes, then bake them in the oven for 30-50 minutes and you have roast potatoes.

Cooking is really simple, it's just about having the confidence to do it. You don't need all this stupid spices shit and fancy cheeses. That's making stuff way too complex. If you can boil pasta and vegetables you can make yourself a meal and then explore cooking more from there. Fuck making your own pizza dough.

>>427
>Cooking is really simple, it's just about having the confidence to do it
>fuck stupid spices
>fuck making your own dough
So you boast self-confidence while simultaneously calling sour grapes upon anything more complicated than boiled/baked potatoes. Shut your fucking face, gaylord. Dough isn't even that tough to begin with.

>>428
Did you try reading the post you cock sucking retard? The advice is learn the very fundamentals and then build up from there. You don't need to learn to make your own dough or pasta when you can get it out of a packet. Covering food in 5 different spices so you can barely taste the original meat is a stupid idea for any one learning to cook. You will never know what tastes good with chicken if you start off by cooking jerk chicken and that's all your comfort zone is. There are infinite numbers of spice packets and jarred sauces to explore once you have the fundamentals down and then start making your own versions of things you like.

Try learning how to teach people things before you bitch at experienced teachers.

>>429
This. With good ingredients you don't even need spices anyway.

>>415
I actually make my own dough and pizza at work since I have the tools to do so. My pizza is typically bagin.

Why are some of you pretending that cooking is hard? It's not. It's just knowing what tastes good and experience.

Eggs are really good for cooking and cheap, easy to make. Omelettes have a huge amount of variation, spanish(potatoes onion), Italian(spinach), french etc, you can add anything you want, even bake it in the oven.

A base for most classical dishes is just butter/garlic/oil/onion making sure not to burn it or cook to long.


Cooking isn't hard, even the most basic stuff like buying a steak and some potatoes goes a long way, it all depends on budget or what you want to eat. But you can still eat well on a low budget, lentils soups, rice+veggies whatever, oven baked simple dishes.

>>433
It's not hard when you know how to do it but that's not what a newbie has experience for.

>>429
>experienced teachers.
You're telling someone to boil potatoes.

>>442
Have you seen some of the niggers at cooking classes? Peeling, chopping and boiling potatoes is a big deal to them. People who can't cook are scared of screwing it up. Boiling some vegetables is like lesson 2-3 on a course and most students will feel accomplished in doing it.

>>397
Is it really necessary to peel the potatoes? I always just threw whole potatoes in to boil, ate them that way. The skin is bitter, mind you, but (so I've heard) the skin is also very good for you.

>>479
No, it's not necessary if the potato is well washed, the potato skin has a lot of nutrients. I also think peeled tastes worse.

I think it's an old style meme for food aesthetics, since unpeeled may look bad. Also it made sense to remove skin since they used to be filthier/mud covered before machine washing.

>>480
Ah, yes. Yeah, I always scrubbed them, if you don't you get some fun mystery crunches in there.

>>396
Read some food theory -> Figure out if you are doing sides or 1 dish -> Buy whatever you wanna cook -> Most easy well tasting fast dishes ALL start with butter/oil/grease in a pan for sauteing then to add garlic and onion, after these have been slightly cooked then add your vegetables/meat/fish and finish off with spices, most "spice vegetables" like chili/ginger however will be added with onion/garlic, know which they are. Whenever you are using onions for a base make sure to add salt, they are done when they start turning slightly yellow and sweat.

If you are ultra pleblord who doesn't even want to deal with pans buy a decent size grill and a couple of solid stainless steel metal cooking plates for grill, even large earthenware trays. For these you just put your vegetables in, many vegs like onions and garlic can be whole cooked. The meat you grill beside the tray with your sides.

Spices are the most important thing in cooking after ingredients, knowing where and when to to use them, bigger the spice rack better the chef, always.

Make your own staple dishes that you enjoy, if you are extremely lazy and dont like cooking at all make a huge batch of freeze friendly dishes like soup and put in freezer in containers you will use for daily dish.

>>397
>microwave cooking
NO

>>483
Microwave is useful when you're still learning in case you start eating your meat and realize it's still raw in some spots. You can nuke it quick rather than start the oven up and wait a long time while everything else gets cold.

>>486
"Research … at the University of California Lawrence Livermore Laboratory concluded that microwaves produced heterocyclic aromatic amines and polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons. Both are suspected carcinogens. Frying meats also produces polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons …"

In a 1991 paper, Swiss food scientist Dr. Hans Ulrich Hertel reported that microwaved food produced carcinogenic effects in the bloodstream.11 It was a small study, consisting of only eight volunteers who drank either raw milk, cooked milk, pasteurized milk or microwave-cooked milk, and organic raw vegetables, cooked conventionally-grown vegetables, organic or conventional frozen vegetables that were then warmed in the microwave, or organic or conventional veggies fully cooked in the microwave.

Before and after each meal, blood tests were taken. Those who ate either microwaved milk or vegetables had decreased hemoglobin levels, increased cholesterol levels, decreased white and red blood cells, and decreased lymphocyte levels, the latter of which suggests increased infection or tissue damage. While there are shortcomings and limitations to this study, the results offer food for thought.


Yeah no thanks bud

>>494
>Frying meats also produces polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons …
Oof. Is it okay to fry eggs? Scrambled eggs are my go to a lot.

>>495
Yeah it's no problem at all, its an old true and tested method anyway used for hundreds of years. I haven't read the cali study myself so i don't know at which rate hydrocarbons are formed. I suspect though that microwave is wayy higher than the natural form of frying. You should be worried about the swiss study.

>Those who ate either microwaved milk or vegetables had decreased hemoglobin levels, increased cholesterol levels, decreased white and red blood cells, and decreased lymphocyte levels, the latter of which suggests increased infection or tissue damage.


This however is the real concerning piece of evidence. Memory holed from 1991.

Hertel also found that when food molecules are deformed by microwaving, radiolytic compounds are formed. Subsequent research suggests these too appear to have carcinogenic potential.12

Not surprisingly, Hertel's study was met with great resistance from those with much to lose. The Swiss electrical appliance establishment lobbied to shut Hertel down, and he was eventually tried and found guilty of "interfering with commerce." American journalist Tom Valentine visited Hertel in Germany in 1992, penning a now classic article on his research13

>(((tried and found guilty of "interfering with commerce.)))

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12734067

>>494
Eh, what doesn't produce carcinogens these da--
>>496
JEWS! I'm throwing out my microwave. Bet it's been uploading naked vids of me too.

You can start by "ramen hacking:" adding things like eggs, scallions, or pork belly to instant ramen to make it closer to 'real food'. Another good place to start would be cooking macaroni and cheese with less help from Kraft; you could cook any pasta and add Velveeta, or a harder cheese melted into roux, to make your own. If you want to get straight into 'real cooking', then you could make your own pasta or ramen from flour and water; this might not save you a lot of money since both are already cheap, but it would absolutely impress a date. >>501 Shalom.

Cooking shit is literally impossible if you don't like doing shit wrong, which is why I just delegate it out to mumsy and tell her what to make.

>>494 >eight volunteers who drank either raw milk, cooked milk, pasteurized milk or microwave-cooked milk, and organic raw vegetables, cooked conventionally-grown vegetables, organic or conventional frozen vegetables that were then warmed in the microwave, or organic or conventional veggies fully cooked in the microwave So eight people, for 4 kinds of milk and 6 kinds of vegetables? Meaning the conclusions are based on blood tests from only two, or at best three people, and there is no room at all for controlling for external variables about the people eating it. Worthless. I'm not tossing my microwave for that.

>>494 This. Also it's probably that their microwaves are releasing a lot of radiation leakage which caused those blood anomalies, it doesn't matter how it's non-ionizing or not when it's 2000W of electricity in the form of heat beamed to some poor ass microwave-ready food, way beyond Fcc limits for non-ionizing radiation. Also the heat is actually the atoms being excited with the trapped electricity that's why it stays hot for too long and people eat this tsk tsk tsk. >>495 It's okay to do what your ancestors had probably been doing for the past eons, like say barbecue that's why we respond to barbecue smoke differently (and feel hungry immediately) it means it is rooted into our genetics while also meaning we have the genes to throw out such toxins, radiation-induced toxins however are very new to us and it's possible we haven't developed enough resistance yet.

>>634 >>396 Cooking is for focused people, like focused enough while driving kind as you can literally lose a finger being stupid much like while driving lose an arm or a leg. If you're afraid of mistakes, it's not for you, otherwise if you're a perfectionist with ENTJ power you can cook even the most dangerous dish free from a speck of mistake. Some people literally stab through their hand while making guacamole, so If you think they're stupid then you are fine but if you're scared as fuck and shaking hearing that then you don't pass as a cook and need a lesson on "being not a pussy" first. Cooking at first is hard, don't rush things and always take it slowly but most of the time it becomes easier to cut through the ingredients the longer you've trained those muscles. It's all muscle memory but even if you're familiar with your tools, they're much more dangerous than ones you have yet to use. rules for cutting >always sharpen, always let the knife cut it on its own than to force it. if the knife is dull enough to pierce a tomato skin, you have more chances of cutting a finger from the extreme force exerted >nails protect you from cutting your other hand >don't cut while you're in a worst mood or too tired/sleepy >just enjoy it and stay focused

>>639 Also, don't try cutting something that's about to roll off the chop board like when cutting across a squash. Always secure them over the board by making a flat base by cutting a small part. Same goes with onions.

>>639 I don't care about cutting myself but my food will never live up to my autistic standards so I don't cook things.

>>639 Unless you've got industrial tools for sharpening blades, what you're referring to is really just straightening the edge that's already there. If one wants knives truly sharpened, there's professionals that can do that.

>>634 Mumsy won't be around forever. Learn a skill. >>639 Fingertips in. Knuckles out.

>>647 Learning is impossible if you don't like doing shit wrong, I'd rather just rely on mumsy to be around forever.

>>648 So are you going to kill yourself after mumsy dies? When I was a kid, I remember every Christmas my parents would invite over their fat loser friend who lived with his mother. He'd always ruin dinner getting drunk then bitching about how he's lonely and is planning to kill himself once his mother dies. His mother died and he didn't have the balls to kill himself and eventually died from diabetes. Anyway, moral of the story is even that guy knew how to cook.

>>400 The most important thing to learn to cook properly is meat. Everything else is secondary, and it's often cheaper and a massive time savings to buy prepared vegetables (canned, frozen, kits).

>>650 >canned veggies Might as well just eat your own shit.

>>649 >knew how to cook >got diabetes Coincidence?

>>654 Absolutely.

>>655 Well I still refuse to ever learn how to cook anything.

>>655 That's America, everything is super sized which isn't always a bad thing. Even the toilets are huge lmao. On the other hand here in my own country fucking peasants don't even know how to build roads or a skyscraper retards here who never think big, its a sacrifice. The high fructose syrup you guys put in your food and drinks though sucks ass, everything is too sweet, even coke tasted bad. (also gifts u the beetus) But the worst of all was no bread. NO REAL BREAD. How do you guys cope with only shitty toasts and some soggy crap.

>>657 Mumsy makes me real homemade bread and I yell at her if she buys shitty brands with high fructose corn syrup and etc. It's not hard, eurocuck. >coke tasted bad Imagine drinking soda like a fucking nigger animal.

>>657 > But the worst of all was no bread. NO REAL BREAD. How do you guys cope with only shitty toasts and some soggy crap. I bake it or go to a bakery. Where were you that you couldn't find real bread? Even supermarkets have a bakery section with some decent things. I've noticed a lot of Europeans come here, eat at some shitty chain restaurant because they are attracted to the sign, then complain about American food. America has lots of options and most are crap. If you come back, ask for the good places to eat. Don't try and figure it out for yourselves. I especially love watching brits puzzle over the menu at Dunkin Donuts, believing they are in a coffee shop.

>>658 Funny story. I was in Subway on my lunch break and these two girls from Italy were at the soda fountain tasting every drink. I was standing there waiting for them to move so I could get some water. This one girl with huge fake eyelashes plastered to her face pours some Hawaiian Punch, sips it, then looks at me and goes "ewwwww" as if it's my fault she's naive.

>>660 You probably should have raped them on the spot.

>>661 >assuming I didn't But they're European. So what we call rape, they call flirting.

>>662 How romantic.

>>660 What's wrong with Hawaiian Punch? Is it a infamously bad drink?

>>660 >>661 >raping them >sticking your dick in disgusting sluts >not stabbing them to death and laughing the entire time If you don't want to kill people, you are a cuck.

>>664 It's like a treat. If you're not prepared for extremely sweet, you're not going to like it.

>>665 >Wanting to kill people >Not killing people The murder equivalent of being cucked.

>>650 >buy prepared vegetables (canned, frozen, kits). What the fuck man >>656 If the first steps to cook due to no money/starvation are eat canned veggies/chicken in the case of that /k/ lad, then no wonder you don't want to even light a stove. You will eventually get the hang out of it unless you find a great woman who knows how to cook, which are becoming exceedingly rare in the last years. >>660 They probably wanted to belittle you for having disgusting drinks in your country, not that i can talk too much, although italians are known for their excellent soda culture (some of the best mineral/fizzy drinks, corporate or handmade, were italian). >>664 Americans, and ergo every place they touch in which they can get away with ingredients, use high fructose corn syrup like it was low quality sugar, making things double or even triple the sweet which becomes very unappealing at times. Hawaiian Punch tastes decent but uses even more syrup, which makes it a bomb that needs obligatory watering down to even flavor its cherry/pineapple flavor. It is not uncommon to see people water down drinks (even soda) in some latin american places, but over the time people just gobble it up without that water ratio which sometimes reached 1:1 (one cup of water by one cup of juice or soda). Another factor was that latin america mandated cane sugar which was normal to see until americans got their hands in many distributors to manufacture their so-called mexican soda, which is merely their normal 50's soda recipe but priced doubly to scam the unsuspecting cattle. After this only Cuba and Mexico had cane sugar as Colombia and Venezuela could not cope with demand (in the former they got jewed, in the latter gommunism destroyed their crops), but Obama made peace with the Castro regime in Niggerland and got their cane sugar, which destroyed the soda industry in Mexico as they could not produce both local demands for grain and continental demands for syrup, which made our local soda start having the syrupy jew. The big problem with corn syrup is that when used in high quantities, like most american recipes do, it produces a mild tingly burning sensation in the tongue and throat along with a low fatty coating, like eating very stale nuts and spices, which is very unappealing for the usual consumer. Hence why in Mexico they have to mix it with Aspartame/Acesulfame or a little Stevia to lower the sensation, but ends up having a longer sweet aftertaste that doesn't let you flavor other foods; you see here people have the nasty tradition of eating highly flavored dishes and wash down the taste with soda to cleanse the palatte and flavor again... at breakfast, so a long aftertaste is also unappealing. Because of all this mess, Pepsi somehow became popular again because their canned presentation is one of the few soda drinks left that uses pure cane sugar, unlike Coca Cola that gambled their market and now has to present like 4 or 5 variations with different mixes of sweeteners. Also reason why americans get banter because they drinks taste like crap compared to more "traditional" corporate drinks, Hawaiian Punch is a notable example because that one burns your throat mildly like wine. They sometimes try to pass it as "treat" or "candy" drinks like satan disguised as a respectable gentleman here >>666, but the truth is candy or treats are made with real sugar. The real man's choice for big corp candy drink is Capri Sun: Pacific Cooler, cherry with grape made with real sugar some years ago after some parents got mad, but they reverted it back when nobody was watching. Their Fruit Punch is also good, it's a drink given to a kid every once in a while as a morale booster but some people hand it like it was a breakfast essential, which is simply badong.

>>668 Thanks for the very comprehensive post, it's bizarre how Americans have corn syrup in everything. I have never tried American soft drinks but I have tried some candy ("Jolly Ranchers"), they were pretty good but extremely sweet and sticky.

Americans are truly disgusting creatures. All deserve to die horribly. Remember that if your local store sell jewburgermutt sugar drinks, you must burn the store down. Also kill any americans that enter tour country.

>>670 Yes, but to be fair americans are nowhere near as silly as their corps make them out to be, many folks there opt for quick solutions (the infamous mexican soda variants) or their regional brands made with the real deal but usually very pricey, like their Boylan soft drink line that manages to be great to excellent but a standard 355ml bottle costs the same as a six-pack of cheap beer or 4 litters of Pepsi. And with export prices like mine you can buy 6 litters of cane sugar Pepsi or a six-pack of good beer. >"Jolly Ranchers" Top of the line candy in terms of artificial flavors, their watermelon and apple are laboratory marvels, but yes they are extremely sticky, if you go dry with one of those it's like having Super/Krazy Glue between your teeth trust me i played with it when i was a kid Capri Sun is a must if you have to pick a single soft drink to taste, but i don't know if there's cream soda outside the U.S., if not then that's my first choice, very decadent, like a carbonated, very buttery vanilla ice cream without any of the dairy.

>>672 >cream soda I have tried it but I don't really like the mix of carbonation and creaminess. Coke floats are great on hot summer days though.

>>673 >carbonation and creaminess It tastes like sweet butter/cream but it's not actually creamy itself, it goes down like any other soda. Soda floats are different but just as good, although Vanilla Coke is best for that trick, heard some stuff about Dr. Pepper but i'm wary, Floats are one of those things you really don't want to shug down after a failed experiment.

>>671 Eurocuck pls

>>668 >They probably wanted to belittle you for having disgusting drinks in your country, not that i can talk too much, although italians are known for their excellent soda culture (some of the best mineral/fizzy drinks, corporate or handmade, were italian). It's tough to belittle someone when you're an ugly whore with huge fake eyelashes. Also, the Italian sodas I've had were all bitter and I wasn't impressed.

>>680 >American doesn't like slightly bitter(natural) and not ultra jewed with cheap HFCS cancer beetus syrup drank shit. my surprise HFCS is america's gutter oil. >>659 >Where were you that you couldn't find real bread? Even supermarkets have a bakery section with some decent things. LOL No they don't, you must legit not know what real bread tastes like. Early on I went to every convenience store and bought expensive bread publix etc(total scams and they all tasted like shit) listen, you literally don't have real bread in stores unless you go to a real bakery there(and good luck finding one). Europe and everywhere else have REAL FRESH BREAD in all convenience stores that actually taste good. And Everything is over sweetened, it's ridiculous, try something new(that obviously has sugar in it) and it's always too fucking sweet to the point where it's nauseating, how the fuck do you incredible people eat that fucking crap? It was the most annoying thing while living there by far. >>658 >Can't buy bread, have to make it. yep pretty much fag, meanwhile in europe you can get pic related in a convenience store.

>>681 You sound like you went to America once and were miserable the entire time because your parents drug you along. You are an autist and a cunt.

>>681 Eurocucks deserve what they bring on themselves.

>>683 There's already a term for people like him. It's eurotrash. They act like pretentious obnoxious cunts when they come over here because they have a chip on their shoulder over a few ignorant American tourists they've encountered but they don't have the self-awareness to understand they are ten times worse. They're filthy. They litter. They make a ruckus. They have a self-righteous moral opposition to the concept of tipping in restaurants. And, as I said before, they go back to their shithole with a distorted impression of American food because they only eat at the crappy chain restaurants with the big shiny signs. They're as dumb as moths but with worse hygiene. And they're too arrogant to admit they prefer the salty over-spiced trash they eat at home because they're used to it, not because it's better.

>>682 It's so funny how you won't even admit it and will just be spiteful about it lol. You have nothing that can be called fresh bread for sale in stores, but keep being pretentious as if most Americans don't just eat wonderbread(r)TM and call it a day since the 50's.. I know. But you know how it is when you don't know what you're missing. Just own it nigger. . >>684 Wow why do you just immediately assume I hate your country or something amerifat, no need to go low self esteem defense mode just because it was pointed out you have no real bread and weird things like how Mexican cola(with real sugar) taste better than in the home of the Goka Gola which uses the cheap mercury infused kike syrup that gives a sick acid reflux and beetus, and heavy metal induced brain damage because it's in fucking everything. https://ehjournal.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/1476-069X-8-2 >Chlorine and caustic soda are produced at chlor-alkali plants using mercury cells or the increasingly popular membrane technology that is mercury free and more energy-efficient. Worldwide there are approximately fifty mercury cell chlor-alkali plants in operation [1]. Of those there are eight in the United States (US) [2]. In 2003 the EPA reported in the Federal Register that on average approximately seven tons of mercury were missing from each plant in the year 2000 [3]. >These chlor-alkali plants have an average of fifty-six cells, each containing as much as 8,000 pounds of mercury According to an archived web page report initially produced by Vulcan Chemicals, mercury grade caustic soda and hydrochloric acid are primarily used by the high fructose corn syrup industry [9]. Following this lead, the EHO conducted an interview with an "organic" producer of high fructose corn syrup (HFCS) in 2004 and was told that the HFCS industry uses both mercury grade caustic soda and membrane grade caustic soda in their manufacturing process to "enhance product shelf life". <With daily per capita consumption of HFCS in the US averaging about 50 grams and daily mercury intakes from HFCS ranging up to 28 μg, this potential source of mercury may exceed other major sources of mercury especially in high-end consumers of beverages sweetened with HFCS lol HCFS ZOG mind numbing agent confirmed HFCS (((bizarre))) chemical brew involving the creation of caustic soda by exposing raw materials to pools of electrified mercury in a large vat. Hahahaha. Very natural, the mercury is contamination a preservative goy!

>>680 >It's tough to belittle someone when you're an ugly whore with huge fake eyelashes It is not when you are in a place like average urban U.S., no offense, same could apply in many parts around here if not worst bar niggers roaming around like savages >were all bitter Nothing wrong with that, it should not be full-on sweet all the time >I wasn't impressed. That's plain bad luck or you don't fancy italian goodness. I've had Campari cherry, Chin8 Neri and some transparent, very fruity one with pulp (tutti frutti flavored i believe) and they were top class, along with the commercial but still serviceable San Pellegrino cans. Although not to pester you, but americans are well-known master of sodas that don't like non-diabeetus level drinks, even some old articles are known for their disgust of them. Here's a known example, some guido went there and hated the Chinotto soda, the tree and, famously, its fruits along with the variations, commonly called in the west as "oranges"

>>682 He sure does sound bitter but there is truth in some of his words, americans simply use too damn much syrup in everything they make. Let's be fair here, even fucking tomato sauce is processed chemically and added high fructose corn syrup to tackle the tomato's acidity, that's insane. In terms of bread, from my experience in some U.S. states i find that a bit unfair, i've tasted good bread from convenience stores (is Target and Safeway convenience stores?) from the usual types like wheat. Sure americans suck utter dick in terms of corn and rye products, along with puff pastries, because they don't eat nor are culturally aligned with those things, obviously they won't have a big doctrine on how to prepare them just like how in Mexico you will very rarely find rye goods anywhere, even in the capital cities, along with dry wheat products being average to mediocre due to low-temperature ovens. Also let's consider "specialized" bakeries, as in day-to-day baking, are not very common either there because people do their groceries once or twice a week due to the retarded highway-tier distances in their cities, hence not everyone will clean the bakery out every day unlike in Europe and some latin american places were it is not uncommon to visit the bakery at least 5 times a week. Also reason why some of their bread tastes funny because they add some stuff to the water while kneading that makes the bread not mold for at least a week (or 3 if retarded and thrown in the fridge). And let's be fair, bread is Europe's standard food sidekick, it's like comparing why Europe doesn't make good tortillas or why their rice quality is sub-par it is they are already extremely specialized in making bread and many bakeries are run by centennial families.

>>686 >That's plain bad luck or you don't fancy italian goodness. My family is from Italy. I've been eating plenty of their products since I was a kid. I don't like their soda. To be fair, I'm not a fan of soda anyway. But I was when I was a kid and still didn't like the Italian stuff. Pellegrino I always thought was OK. But that's popular here, anyway. >>687 Jarred sauce in America is awful. Even the "imported from Italy" stuff. I grow tomatoes and make it myself. But that's something everyone should be doing. I don't understand the concept of buying sauces that are easy enough to make in the kitchen. But, it really isn't as hard as you seem to think to find things without the corn syrup in them. Even in a supermarket. Also bakeries are more common than you think as well as European delis. What I was saying is that I bet pissed off anon who won't show his flag is one of those Slovakian assholes who goes around looking for things to bitch about.

>>688 You have a mutt flag and defend the US. That means whatever you say is automatically invalid and is just mutt gutter speak. >muh family is from Italy >I'm 1/48th Italian to go with my other nationalities that make up my mystery meat "heritage". Go grind yourself up into burgers for the other mutts to feed on, cunt.

>>689 Useless trolling. I'm pointing out your retardation more than defending anything.

>>689 >Go grind yourself up into burgers for the other mutts to feed on, cunt. Ausfag detected.

>>670 Corn is subsidized in the states so it's not too hard to believe. It makes HFC very cheap.