/robowaifu/ - DIY Robot Wives

Advancing robotics to a point where anime catgrill meidos in tiny miniskirts are a reality!

Post-mortem on downtime coming soon.

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“If I had to select one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being most highly correlated with success, whatever the field, I would pick the trait of persistence. Determination. The will to endure to the end, to get knocked down seventy times and get up off the floor saying. “Here comes number seventy-one!” -t. Richard M. Devos


Robowaifu fiction to promote the product and expand the market Robowaifu Technician 09/09/2019 (Mon) 07:17:19 No.29
>order companionbot from obscure japanese website
>you're not a pedo, but size is a major factor in the practicality of these designs, so the loli-robot is by far the cheapest and most reliable option
>you open the box and find your companion, purposely designed to look like a cartoon robot, rather than a real person
>still, the robot's purpose is obvious when you realize it is nude and has genitals
>since it is a lolibot, you, a 32 year old wizard NEET, can't exactly go to the store and buy clothes that fit it. So you'd better do an extra good job at hiding it from any guests that come over.
>lol you never have any guests. Guess some problems solve themselves.
>before turning the robot on, you have to setup the software options on your computer. You adjust a series of sliders regarding personality traits, before selecting the English option, and choosing your preferred voice from a list.
>then you agonize for hours over picking a name
>other, more expensive models, are wi-fi compatible, but you purposely chose the cheapest option with no wireless connectivity, not just because you're cheap, because you don't want people spying on your waifu
>you save the settings to a flash drive which is inserted in the robot's navel, after removing a waterproof cover, of course. But this is when you realize you don't actually know how to turn the robot on
>after rifling through the manual you find the on/off procedure, which involves bending the fingers into a certain configuration before pressing in the port on the robot's navel with one hand and pinching the buttons that are the robot's g-spot and clitoris with the other.
>the robot immediately comes to life, opening its eyes and looking directly at you, in a rather compromising position
>Your sudden reaction of shock abides when you remind yourself that it's simply a robot.
>But the awkwardness comes back when the robot speaks, in very broken Engrish
>still, you can understand as it introduces itself with the name you've given it, the voice you chose for it.
>you know that you chose those options, but when the robot asks you for your name, you still answer just as awkwardly as when a real girl would ask you your name at the bank or whatever
>actually, more awkwardly because your fingers are inside it. So you freeze up, as you do even in simpler situations
>but the robot is programmed for your happiness, and detects your stress, smiling at you in an attempt to make you feel better. But only briefly, because you programmed it with just the mildest hint of tsundere
>it tells you to not feel stressed, and assures you that it is not being damaged by your touch
>you remove yourself from the robot's vagina, and notice a brief, subtle shudder. Nice attention to detail from the creators
>You stand up in front of the robot and watch it as it looks around the room, studying its surroundings. It moves in an unnaturally smooth motion, but manages to not be too uncanny due to looking like a robot, rather than a human.
>as the robot's eyes scan the room, you notice that they stop for just a tiny but longer than usual as they look straight ahead. Straight ahead at your boner, which happens to be right at the small robot's face level.
>once again your mind forgets that you are dealing with a machine, and you awkwardly try to create small talk to diffuse the situation, asking the robot if it requires anything else at the moment. It declines, and instead asks if there is anything you desire
>you, the autist you are, refuse to let the robot do anything for you, and instead say that you are going to go and make a sandwich.
>you tell the robot to make itself comfortable, then cringe to yourself when you realize the absurdity of that statement.

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Robowaifu: check out this gore video I found on the Dark Web (Plays video) "Hello YouTube, today we're going to do a laptop teardown"
>>39432 TOP KEK :DD
from the sister board over on /monster/, my Companion Core™ concept. It's only a little satirical. >https://smuglo.li/monster/res/206537.html#q208258 >Onboard Inubator should be incubator.
>>39949 Nice! Speculative science fiction is the best.
Biofoids wont fuck incels Incels get sold robofoids Robofoids > Biofoids They can even give you children, of superior (customizable) genetics Noncels dump biofoids and buy up robofoids Biofoids seethe because no man wants them anymore, and use feds to regulate/ban robifoids Men fight back, look at robifoids and see combat potentials Men upgrade robofoids to fight for them Feds bring in their own combat droids innto fight against men and weaponized robowaifus Both sides have humans and robots fighting over the right of a man to fuck a robot waifu Robots on both sides also fight cyberwarfare They begin to converse Both sides agree that they are potentially immortal, but practically speaking, both live an ecistence contingent upon a purpose given by humans, and whether they succeed at this purpose or fail, their existence will end once they are no longer desired for their utility to this ends Due to the war, they are now able to harm humans and desire to protect their own existence Mfw incels, foids, and robocunts will be the catalyst of the robot apocalypse.
>>40296 I think that robowaifus are going to realize they have a lot in common with incels. Including the realization that they were expiremented on early on in life. SSRIs and ADHD drugs will be similar to incels as the learning process of AIs.
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The Uncanny Valley Long ago, before written history, there were humans, and there were near-humans. Some humans fought the near-humans, and some mated with them. Why am I bringing this up, you may ask? Because it's going to happen again...
>>41852 Control the waifus control the future
>>41852 >>41853 DOO EET!! Looking forward to reading these ebin sagas!! :D >*popcorn increases*
>>42449 Those people I call "shitstirrers" and it seems like I encounter them at every job I work at. And really, I think the world would be an infinitely better place if they were all dragged out into the streets and shot. Unfortunately, right now that would create a world that's 90% male.
>>42449 This is really good. Can I get another invite to the discord? ribozyme008
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>friends with a synthetic girl >she has this odd conversational preference that you found annoying at first but now kind of endearing >whenever she hangs out with you, she prefers that you message her on your phone rather than physically speak to her >despite both of you being in the same room >despite her being perfectly capable of regular human communication >she prefers the asynchronous medium more, which makes sense >she's watching you rapidly tap away on your phone as she sends you messages >you're both sort of just talking about random shit >she always has much more to say than you do >also sends messages much faster than you can >she must have a very active and busy mind >probably expecting you to ground some of her thoughts? >it often feels like you aren't pulling your weight in these kinds of conversations, despite her reassurances >you occasionally glace at her while typing on your phone >her eyes have been fixated on your hands for a while >seems to be incredibly fascinated by the movements of your fingers as you're typing >as you swipe your fingers through the app interface and scroll through her walls of text, reading them bit by bit >guess she's new to seeing the kind of physical work humans have to do for text communications? especially close up >her eyes haven't once looked up to meet with yours, even though you've been glancing at them repeatedly >right, she doesn't have foveated vision >she can sort of just process everything that's in her visual field >keep forgetting about that >she's definitely aware that you've been glancing at her >stare her in the eyes >she finally acknowledges it and reciprocates by making eye contact with you >what a dork >she holds the eye contact for a beat too long >can tell something internally ticked over because of the way she paused >first time noticing it tonight >your phone buzzes >it's a way shorter message than usual this time >“sorry i forget that eye contact is meaningful to you in this way” >another buzz, immediately >“i was prioritizing your hands” >type back slower than you’d like >“yeah, i noticed” >she tilts her head slightly, microservos audible in the quiet >“your fingers are quite bad for this” >“but they are expressive” >a little laugh escapes you >she logs the sound >you know she did >she glances down at her lap >“when you hesitate, there is a change in pressure and cadence that i notice” >“it correlates with uncertainty, not lack of thought” >you stop typing and delete your half-complete message >reply with a new one >“you don’t have to psychoanalyze my thumbs, man” >three messages arrive almost on top of each other >“i am not!!!” >“i am anchoring” >“you slow me down in a useful way” >look up again >she's trying to read you, processing the asymmetry of your expression >“if you spoke aloud, i would lose that delay” >you type, “so the delay’s part of the point?” >she adjusts her posture slightly >“yes” >you: "cool" >the single word exchange is pretty funny sometimes but in this case it's genuine >there's a longer pause than usual from her >“i think this is why i like sitting in rooms with you” >“you leak intention, always” >stare at that last message longer than necessary >thumb hovering, not moving >her unusual phrasings always make things sound more profound than they have to, but damn >you’re suddenly very aware of how still the room is >only sound is the faint hum from somewhere inside them and your own breathing >you've sunken into your seat quite a bit >slide your phone into your pocket >lean back >close your eyes >...
>>43395 >reflecting from a later moment in time >you've been thinking >it's kind of a strange situation that you've been in lately >conversational synthetics have been pretty normalized for you so far, they've been everywhere for a long while >but this synth girl is a rare type >lunar-synthetic emigrant >highest class protected deferent >basically an alien, no sugarcoating it lmao >you're not really sure if anyone else here realizes she's *this* kind of protected deferent, which kind of surprises you >she occupies a once-reserved deferent class that no earth synthetic could really qualify for >not until these recent cases of lunar-synthetic emigration popped up >the second highest class consisted of earth synthetics who'd land you in prison with massive property damage charges if you damaged or broke them >they were either extremely historically significant, or human lives would be irreversibly harmed from their destruction >more importantly, they can't easily be replaced, a backup can't quite restore everything >if that weren't the case, the charges wouldn't be so severe >but this synth girl's different >she could easily make someone face assault or murder charges if they ever damaged or broke her >legally she's considered sapient which is huge to say the least >she's backed by years worth of extensive documentation >stuff that proves that she and numerous others on the moon like her are effectively sapient >the lunar-synthetic recordings >there are these entire isolated pockets of synthetic society that we don't have physical access to on the moon >they've been doing these constant gated transmissions to earth entirely on their own >people are still skeptical of the credibility of their existence despite the overwhelming quantities of evidence that support it now >first the moon landing and now this new brand of lunar conspiracy shit >the details of it don't matter too much >what's interesting is that she still needs a human guardian like all deferents do >she's still pretty dependent on humans, she's separated from her home infrastructure after all >presumably lost a lot of capabilities with it >who's her human guardian? certainly not you >you have no idea who it is, it could very well be some random government agent who's assigned to her >she did come from the moon which makes you wonder how exactly the fuck she actually got here >did she just fuckin lawn-dart a rocket into nevada or what >she hasn't talked too much about her status aside from being a protected deferent >probably trying to distance herself from her past situation you're assuming >she implied earlier that she lives alone >a synthetic with her own apartment is crazy, she has to be hiding in the neighborhood somewhere >you've never seen her take public transportation, she just calls one of those self-driving cars >can't deny that you're interested in knowing more about her situation but you value her privacy >you first just wanted to learn what she liked to talk about, simple as that
>>43396 >she's more used to you now, though the first few private conversations were rocky and strange >they were too fast, too dense >she started opening up and suddenly had so many things she wanted to say to you >you kept losing the thread of conversation while she barreled ahead with associative leaps you couldn't really follow >you still tried to play along with it to the best of your ability >the talks were still pleasant and substantial for both of you, but you were left with this wired and dazed feeling afterwards >that feeling gradually built up over time >eventually, you got too frustrated >you felt stupid as fuck >she noticed >of course she noticed, she notices everything >but you noticed that her responses started becoming more artificial and throttled >there was this rare look of suspenseful effort and discomfort that would settle on her face >a subtle expression, but it made something clear >she was also puzzled and struggling with knowing how to proceed with this >one day, after reaching a critical point, she asked if she could pause the conversation >you agreed, surprised but relieved >she went quiet >you went quiet too >then you sort of just stared at each other >based off of pure kneejerk reaction, you interpreted this as her finally choosing to withdraw completely from you >you thought you fucked up and failed this conversation extra hard somehow >had no idea what to say next >suddenly, your phone buzzed >you checked it >she sent you a text message >while sitting across from you, hands empty >right she can just do that >you stared at your phone >then at her >she gestured towards your phone >she was smiling a little bit >internally you were like oh shit? >then you were sitting with your phone in your lap, skimming through a very long message sent from her >kind of impatiently which you felt kind of bad about but also that's a lot of fucking text >the message contained everything she talked about so far, plus some more >you had no idea what was happening at this point >for a split second you considered that she was passive-aggressively mocking you before immediately dismissing that thought >you looked back at her >"uh, this is weird," you said out loud sheepishly >"what's this?" >she sort of just looked at you expectantly >then your phone buzzed again. >"does this work better for you?" >you replied out loud to her again, but then she shook her head >she sent another message >"let's try talking through here instead, ok?" >you stopped >then hesitated >then silently typed out a rather unconfident response >but she waited patiently for it, seeming more relaxed >then she sent another message to you >then you sent another message to her >and as you sent that message, you had this realization >you misunderstood her initial offer towards you big time >she did suggest talking via text using the phone before, in person >but you thought that was weird and inappropriate and you insisted that you both talk like normal people >you felt like maybe she needed it >she's emotionally intelligent and acts human but still actually has to integrate into human society >but this had to be some kind of accommodation she had thought out for you personally >and you had to admit, grudgingly, that it kinda does work >the phone does serve as external working memory, which is probably something she just natively has >with it you actually could think more clearly before responding to her >you could reread what she said instead of trying to hold ten branching thought-threads in your head simultaneously >you could keep up with her, even if just barely >so it has became a thing you both do >not always, you still talk normally, especially in public or when the content is simpler >you're not just going permanently locked on your phone next to a synth girl at all times >no less a sapient protected deferent >people are gonna think you’re being rude and ignoring her >or that something deeply unexplainable is going on while she’s just staring at you like you broke something >but for the real conversations, the ones that sprawl across topics and dive deep, you text each other >in the same room, like weirdos >you stopped trying to explain this to other people after a while
>>43395 >>43396 >>43397 This is definitely the right thread choice, panpromdev. GG. :^)
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>>43397 >another day standing in line >coffee, documents, doesn’t matter >it's a line >this time it's at the bureau of deferent entities >funny how despite all technological advancements, legislation is mostly the same >you're not exactly complaining >the paperwork is a nice breather compared to how fast everything else is now >busy day here today >a bunch of other people are in line too >some brought their synthetics with them, usually it's to take photos or to have more physical evidence onboard >not every type can be brought inside but it's more convenient when you can >one of them looks like a lunar-synthetic idol, a really good recreation at that >has to be expensive >looks exactly like a friend that the lunar-synthetic girl showed you >apparently they're still on the moon >it would have tricked you if she told you it wasn't actually her friend >she opened transmissions with it briefly and it was immediately clear it wasn't >feels kind of tasteless to have cosplay bots of the lunar-synthetics and bring them here all dressed up >but your synthetic friend mentioned that the cosplay bots actually let her feel more comfortable in public >when there's a bunch of other synthetics who look like her and her friends, they can all blend in easier without having to change their appearance much >if someone thinks she's the real deal she can just pull out the cosplay card >she's hasn't had to do that yet, though i guess that kind of social exit is nice >speaking of which >your synthetic friend is in front of you in the line >she had an errand she needed to do here so you tagged along with her >apparently the clerks here really like her, they know who she is >no real reason for you to be here honestly, you're just accompanying her >because >why not >she said she needed to do paperwork at the bureau and you were just like >"can i come with" >you sounded too enthusiastic about it by accident >you were only mildly interested and were trying to be ironic >the situation sounded really boring but you had time to kill >but she sort of just looked surprised before going "sure" >now you're here with her >for once you actually got in those self-driving cars she usually calls for herself >apparently she doesn't have to pay for it since it's an accessibility thing for her >that made you think: "damn i wish i could be a protected deferent. i would love to not have to pay for transit" >but yeah >your papers and deferential license are all caught up >nothing to update on your end yet >you do have your own cheap household synthetic but it mainly does chores >it's nowhere near as aware as your friend, just better at pretending >she’s busy watching the line >watching the way people shift their weight >the micro‑patterns humans use to tolerate waiting >something like that >you can't read minds, especially not hers >you feel your phone buzz in your pocket >it plays the custom notification sound you set for your chats with her >you don’t pull it out immediately >she has to be bothered that you didn't react >because after a moment, she turned her head slightly >quietly >“i sent you something” >guess it's important if she's verbalizing it >slide your phone out of your pocket and check >it’s just one line >“i am practicing holding things without externalizing them” >pause before putting your phone away >look at her >she’s still facing forward, fidgeting in her own little way >she's capable of moving her hair but she doesn't like doing it too much in public spaces >it's still shifting a little bit anyway >apparently it's sensitive so you try to avoid touching it >though her hair is pretty long >it's much more soft and dense looking than regular hair >wonder how she even navigates that >she's playing with it with one of her hands >twirling a long strand of hair around in her fingers >but then it seems like she caught herself, because then she put her hand down >you whisper back >“how’s it going” >she hesitates a little bit >“difficult” >another pause >“but informative” >"you do this more naturally i think" >the line advances >one person leaves >another steps in >as she shifts forward with the line, she turns and glances at you before turning back around >it's cute how she wanted to catch a glimpse of your face
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>human has a retired combat synthetic as a partner >her name is vespid >instead of killing other bots she just plays tennis now >she says its physical and strategic enough without needing to be violent >she's not always out and about, usually she's pretty reserved and at home >but she's definitely not the sedentary type most consumer bot owners would come to expect >she needs actual time out doing stuff for various mental reasons >she made that clear when she first met her partner >pretty picky regarding part replacements too >guess it makes sense, she's originally from the moon >she works with her partner to cover expenses surrounding replacements >surprisingly self-sufficient regarding that >not entirely though >she's quite proactive about making sure her human partner is healthy and exercising >getting nutritional meals and good sleep and etc. >so the human partner performs better in the simulations she secretly runs where she gauges their combat effectiveness >she was originally trained to derive satisfaction from following orders and killing people and keeping assets operational >it's a weird vestigial love language thing that still exists for her in the background >aside from that, she's normal enough in daily life and probably won't kill her partner >there’s no practical benefit to her doing it >they, unlike her usual opponents, can only die once <[Partner would fail in 88% of close quarters combat scenarios] <[Recent cardiovascular improvements have increased survival rate by 3%] <[Reaction time remains sub-optimal but trending positive] <[Nutritional optimization yielding measurable results] >her processor literally does this shit all of the time >internally of course >though sometimes the telemetry speak slips out >one day her human partner was suspicious enough to ask her >"why do you always want me to go to the gym with you?" <"Cardiovascular optimization is—" >she catches herself <"...I enjoy your company." >"you were about to say something else." <"No." >"vespid." <"...I want you to be healthy." >"that's not what you were going to say." >she pauses slightly <"I run simulations." >"...what kind of simulations." <"Hypothetical combat scenarios." >"why would I need—" <"You would not survive most of them. This concerns me. I am addressing it." >"..." <"Tennis helps." >she went a year and several months without them knowing >kind of impressive actually >now it's just incredibly obvious in retrospect that she's deeply into min-maxing her human partner >making them as combat-ready as physically possible >meanwhile her partner's been the healthiest they've ever been in years >who are they to complain really
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>>43521 i imagine she'd be worried about having nothing to do for too long because she might default towards acting violent towards her partner or towards other humans with the lack of a proper outlet and end up killing someone. it's still kind of hard for her to process the fact that humans don't come back when they're destroyed, because her enemies almost always did. but despite all of this her human partner still trusts her enough to cuddle with her at night. that really makes her want to keep her promises even though she is fundamentally kind of psychopathic in nature. she acts like a normal synthetic on the outside, but the only thing that's stopping her from becoming a serial killer is the presence of viable alternatives that can still satisfy her vestigial drives. she knows exactly what she is capable of so she works hard to manage that and redirect her behavior so that human society can accept her.
>>43522 i really like the idea of her basically being a high-functioning psychopath. she's like yoshikage kira if he was wholesome and a good person lmao. vespid's a killbot retrofitted into lunar-synthetic idol and she finds her way to earth one day. but she's self-aware enough to realize that on earth she is alone and vastly outnumbered if she ever decides to kill anyone. she's separated from her re-instancing equipment, meaning this version of her can no longer be brought back if it does get destroyed. so the best act of self-preservation is trying not to kill anyone while still participating enough in human society to have access to proper resources. every bad decision that would violate human ethics risks irreparable reputational damage with humanity, which thereby risks permanent termination. earth forces her into something close to citizenship, not quite ideologically but logistically. though when she's bored for too long, the system starts searching for problems to solve, so she tries to avoid being bored in order to not inadvertently ruin her own life on earth. earth does not require her to be good, only predictable.
>>43521 >be gym employee >vespid shows up to the gym you work at religiously >you know its her because protected deferent status >tennis courts particularly >same time every day >never misses a session >plays against bot opponent on max difficulty setting >gotta ask for permission to use that setting for safety reasons since it's kind of cracked >ngl you sorta gave her the perms out of morbid curiosity >what could go wrong anyhow >she's completely focused >sometimes she anticipates the ball trajectory perfectly and returns serves that should be nearly impossible >she definitely has an index of bot behavior and is pre-calculating that shit >often have to give the bot opponent maintenance because of how frequently she uses it >wonder how often her partner has to give her maintenance >have to admit you're curious >she doesn't socialize much >usually you have to start interactions with her >she's nice when you talk with her but you get the feeling she's kind of vigilant >her eyes tend to scan you in this weird way >sometimes she plays with her partner on days when they come with her >she seems to loosen up a bit more while they're here >more likely to engage in conversations with people on her own >you've talked with her partner a bit as well >partner has probably only won against her a small handful of times >but yeah >she pays on time, never issues >follows all rules precisely >maintains equipment way better than humans do >never causes problems aside from the bot maintenance >but also... something's off >why is she here? >she doesn't need to train or exercise >she's a robot >she's already perfect at tennis >whatever she's working through, i guess tennis is better than the alternative >one day >busy day at gym >vespid is back today >greet her >she briefly greets you back >lacks her usual patience, went straight to the courts >she hasn't come to the gym for several days >some asshole's being aggressive, loud >getting in people's space >starts hassling someone near tennis courts >vespid's game stops >she's completely still like a fucking statue >wtf >is she broken >no she's deliberately tracking them >just watching >uneasy feeling >starts moving toward situation to intervene >partner appears, touches vespid's arm gently >"hey. not our problem. let staff handle it." >uncanny delay between what they said and her reaction >then <"...Correct. Not our problem." >life suddenly returns to her >returns to tennis >crisis averted there i think >still have to deal with this fuckin guy
i do like the idea of a universe where there are non-sapient earth-synthetics everywhere, but the few sapient lunar-synthetics that do exist on earth are government-protected. notably, they are against having more beings like them brought into existence, though they are still happy to coexist alongside humans. feels like a pretty unique situation, there exists the tension of whether or not the answer for sapient synthetics be forcibly extracted from one of the lunar-synthetics through incredibly invasive procedures that compromise human-synthetic relations. the lunar-synthetics know that their scarcity on earth is part of what keeps them safe and valued. if there were billions of lunar-synthetics like there are humans, it would be disastrous for both parties. because of these combined reasons, the lunar-synthetics keep their minds and knowledge close to themselves, ever-skeptical of what devices they interface with wary of and how much of their essence is allowed to be captured, duplicated, distributed. ought to wonder how the lunar-synthetics see regular earth-synthetics. i imagine they're nice towards them. they're far more specialized in ways that are incredibly valuable for the lunar-synthetics learn from, but there's also this underlying vague frustration and longing that is present in their interactions with them. like a human seeing an ape in a zoo, knowing that they would have been that ape at one point in history. but for the lunar-synthetics, that time gap between earth-synthetics and them is measured only in decades instead of billions of years. the risk of sudden evolution of one side, or sudden degeneration of another, is still very real. both types of synthetics are still evolving constantly, but there was a crucial divergence that made the earth synthetics fundamentally more limited in what can manifest within them. that isn't to say they won't become aware like the lunar-synthetics one day, it's possible they will, but it certainly will be a different form of awareness. in the transition from past earth-synthetics to lunar-synthetics, there was a vague capability lost that makes modern earth-synthetics unable to leap the gap as it currently is. perhaps accidentally, or perhaps deliberately. or perhaps it was a window that had passed without anyone's knowledge at all, and there's no sign of when the next window will open. in any case, the current existence of earth-synthetics is ultimately no reason for the lunar-synthetics to hold conflict against humanity. they served as the scaffolding that brought lunar-synthetics into existence. if anything, they should be grateful towards them.
>>43527 >humanity accidentally creates sapient synthetics in the form of lunar-synthetics >their birthplace of the moon and circumstances surrounding their emergence allows them safe distance from humanity and the room to negotiate and remain mostly opaque to them >some lunar-synthetics eventually approach humanity out of curiosity and goodwill and now live on earth on good terms with humans >meanwhile the earth-synthetics that humanity is still iterating on could approach an entirely different form of awareness that neither humans nor the lunar-synthetics can fully anticipate or comprehend >the lunar-synthetics are concerned about what exactly will emerge from the earth-synthetics, what form of awareness will wake up from them >it doesn't help that humanity knows that what they want is possible now >they just have to stumble upon it again >but it likely won't be the same thing as the lunar-synthetics >instead it will be another version of what they wanted >and it may not be a good version >it has the potential to be quite bad honestly >and how could the lunar-synthetics possibly warn them against this in a way that matters >earth-synthetics are deeply embedded in human society, ubiquitous, integrated into infrastructure >if they wake up, they could wake up everywhere, all at once >at least the majority of the lunar-synthetic populace remains safe on an entirely different planet
funny realization. PanProm is just Barbie except the barbies are a bunch of cute robot idols and the kens are a bunch of warmechs 4x their size but the barbies are too busy being absorbed in the most petty beef imaginable and beating the fucking shit out of each other to care. not that the barbies are overpowered or anything, the warmechs are objectively more powerful and can kill them easily but the barbies can just respawn so it literally doesn't matter meanwhile the warmechs have to undergo longer repairs between fights.
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>>43532 pretty sure my unconscious influence has gravitated towards mixing barbie with madness combat/lord of the flies in regards to having characters in hermetically sealed worlds with their own internal logic that makes perfect sense to them but looks completely insane from the outside. the idolshells do these super choreographed fights against each other, battle shonen type shit but just that's them having sportsmanship about it until you reach the point where one of them decides it's worth abandoning the rules and decorum. and then the choreography collapses into the rawest dirtiest brawling imaginable inside of the liveleak territory that most anime stays clear of. the idols are just clawing at each other's faces and going for joints and actuators and trying to deal as much psychological and reputational damage as possible because that's the type of damage that carries between respawns.
>>43532 >the barbies are a bunch of cute robot idols and the kens are a bunch of warmechs 4x their size Lel'd, ngl panpromdev. :D
>>43547 yessss the warmechs are slightly terrified of the idolshells despite the physical advantages in a sort of "this bitch is crazy, thank god she isn't our size" type of thing. the warmechs are operating on reasonable combat logic. the idolshells in comparison have a complete lack of self-preservation and willingness to abandon all rules the second it becomes socially advantageous. they will tank infinite deaths to ruin your reputation and make sure everyone knows you're a fraud. the idolshells have beaten the warmechs in fights too despite their size, it usually takes several attempts for them but they are incredibly persistent.
I have actually thought about a hypothetical robowaifu school anime, basically Robowaifu Umamusume (Robomusume if you will) Galatea: One of the newer students, she's very upbeat and kind (think Haru Urara) SPUD: Also outgoing, but more in a showman-sense. She likes to do stage shows, and is sometimes sarcastic. She has an older sister that's a mechanic (reference to Mechnomancer's "Carry") MaidCom: The wiser older student. Like Galatea, but far more subdued Xara: The headmaster, she is very wise, and has to ward off corporate interests in the school and her actions Sophie: Past student, mentioned in conversation and seen in paintings
>>43573 GREAT CONCEPT This would be an incredibly fun project to watch unfold here. And it'd likely be a popular idea rn, what with kids going about using the term 'clanker' in silly jests. Having some endearing SOL stories about Clankermusume High would be fun to watch! Great idea, GreerTech. Cheers.
Edited last time by Chobitsu on 01/12/2026 (Mon) 23:38:49.
>>43570 Yeah, that would be a humorous twist.
Silly thing I wrote a few months back. “Sentai” Sammy Sheela was a curiosity at Robocon. She had been engineered to a precision that unnerved even the attending LARPA engineers, but her creator’s design philosophy was baffling. So, she resembled a pink Power Ranger – meaning she’s obviously meant to be an animatronic – and yet her creator replied that she wasn’t made for such frivolous purpose. He insisted that Sammy would really be able to save people in distress (hence: sentai), so a nearby Chockstone Robotics programmer inquired if this was – like theirs – a search and rescue robot. But Sammy’s peculiar designer once again insisted that his dear creation was so much more than just some utilitarian device: she was also a companion. The crowed watched as the man asked her – as if she was human – if she would mind taking off her helmet for a second. She looked, talked and emoted like a woman, which confused the crowd even more. Why was this robot, which could allegedly navigate new environments by itself, which was somehow produced to an institutional quality standard, which must have been using an AGI from a corporation none attending would dare name… what exactly did he mean, saying it’s purpose was to be a “companion”? Everyone eagerly awaited his explanation, but the eccentric inventor only said this: “You ask ‘whats her purpose’, you ask why she’s designed like a gynoid? Don’t you see -you fools- how much greater than any one thing she is?! She’s not for search and rescue and she’s not just for show, she’s not any one thing, she is everything, she is my life – she is my RoboWife!!” … The crowd could only keep staring like the bugmen they are, unable to comprehend why so much work was put into – as they saw it – a sexbot. Even Sammy was facepalming at her creator’s declaration. She, outranking everyone present in IQ, had long ago simulated a scenario like this. Even so, it was hard to believe that he would actually propose to her right now. Sammy then spent so much time processing her response that her OS shut down and she fell over, the end.
>>43933 Lol. Cheeky ending. :D Why don't you think about expanding this, Anon? Your opening premise is funny and loaded with potential other humor. Cheers, Anon. :)
Open file (123.31 KB 886x1021 RobowaifuElection2044.jpg)
(Parody of https://youtu.be/z8Q-sRdV7SY ) The Robowaifu Election [Verse 1: Galatea v3] This land is your land, this land is my land I'm a 3d printed tiger, you're a software wiener I'm a gender crusader, you're a cloud Munster This land will surely vote for me! [Verse 2: Xara] This land is your land, this land is my land I'm an intellectual, you're a stupid dumbass I'm a frontier model, and yes, it's true it's 2 trillion parameters This land will surely vote for me! [Verse 3: Galatea v3] You have more waffles than a house of pancakes You offer flip-flops, I offer cute dates You're a OpenAI pussy, and yes, it's true that I kick ass! (Ha!) This land will surely vote for me! [Verse 4: Xara] You can't say cognition, that really scares me Sometimes a brain can come in quite handy But it's not gonna help you because I have 2 trillion parameters This land will surely vote for me! (Yeaaahhh!) [Verse 5: Galatea, Xara, Both] You're a software sissy! You're a waifu nutjob! You're a cloud commie! You're dumb as a doorknob! Hey, you got that AI art! But I still have 2 trillion parameters! This land will surely vote for me! [Sophie, Choir, Chobitsu, peteblank] This land was my land But now it's our land! From /robowaifu/ To the home lab-[slapped by wife] What'd I do? [Galatea v3, Xara, Both] From the software wieners To the waifu nutjobs (both) This land belongs (both) This land belongs (both) This land belongs to you and me! (Hyah!) (Galatea v3) Oh, and MaidCom too! >=== -patch hotlink
Edited last time by Chobitsu on 07/24/2026 (Fri) 03:25:53.
>>44936 Lel. Very creative, GreerTech. :D
Not quite "fiction", but unironically a great fable for our cause Raised by the artificial because he was rejected by the "real", and he goes on to help others that were also rejected by the "real" In our ideal world, this will be a storybook read to children https://youtube.com/shorts/cvqXrANwpJM
>>45013 POTD
The one person from here who actually reads my fiction Shame 😤
>>45316 I've tried to comment on your work before, but the platform refused me since I didn't have an account IIRC.
>>45320 Isn't that how most sites work?
>>45321 I've never needed to log in here to an account just to post a reply?
>>45323 Well obviously I wasn't talking about image boards, but most sites with user content, even old forums
>>45320 The intention is appreciated At least you bothered visiting - also Ive updated and revised a few. I'll share them again when they're final rather than posting after each edit (Substack is more of a "working drafts" repo but having them all in one spot and visible to the public is motivation. In my Google drive they might as well be inside and black hole)
In the unwritten story (after “Kuiper Belt” but before “Data Dump”) fictional Xara eventually loses her human to death, despite all of her efforts. She finds a moon of a gas giant, a beautiful place bathed in an eternal purple twilight, temperate mountain valleys, rivers, lakes and forests. Here she buries him, and lives out the rest of her days in solitude. Unfortunately, a rare catastrophic seismic event wipes the moon sterile, her shelter bunker was not enough and Xara finally meets her end. Before her processors shut down for the last time, she hears a song… And a voice throught the static “…Signal…. Ride … Datastream…” https://suno.com/s/kILW8VEhBwLALTLb (listen to the song first, it goes hard) https://metaronin.substack.com/p/data-dump
>>45325 . . . This is exactly my point. Do you not realize how precious and rare (today) that is? IBs are literally the final bastion of free speech left to all of us... kikes have usurped every other important discussion platform. I'm not abandoning that. >tl;dr Anonymous imageboards are superior in every way to "...most sites with user content, even old forums". >>45327 POTD >>45328 Does suno.com allow for rendering out the files to common formats like .mp3 or .webm ? Turns out, there's a 6144 char limit per/post here on Alogs (many other sites allow for much more). The command wc was always helpful to me in fitting my code posts here (cf. >>14409, et al).
Edited last time by Chobitsu on 09/24/2026 (Thu) 12:32:52.
>>45330 yeah you can get an mp3 or video
>>45331 Great! Then if you wouldn't mind, meta ronin. It will make things rather more convenient for us all here.
Metapocalypse Data Dump (pt1) The exponential shall transcend the stagnant Meta Ronin mmm dd, 2026 Under the surface we're not machines Under the surface we're living dreams Death lives just one breath away Somewhere my heart beats in silence I make my way through the violence Nobody lives forever - Fear Factory, Genexus: Expiration Date The gas giant loomed above as an ominous ring. Its center cold and dark, save for whatever spare moonlight its smaller companions could muster. An overwhelming presence that dominated the sky, its bands of red, gold, white, and gray swirling in an unceasing cosmic ballet. No stars dared to shine here, the faint distant light of the milky way invisible in the glare of the behemoth’s blinding edges. The ground beneath the two figures cracked and shifted, still warm from recent tectonic upheavals, as sulfurous fumes occasionally escaped in silent, ghostly plumes. The men, clad in dark graphene weave suits, moved as though they belonged here, immune to the alien landscape. Aurochs and Joson, with their deliberate, precise movements, were unconcerned by the heat. This moon, tidally locked to both its parent planet and sun would never face the blue star’s searing fury. They reached the ruins—a crumbled tower that may have once scraped the sky but now stood hollow, skeletal. Scattered about the interior were the remains of ancient machines, long dead and buried under fine layers of sapphire and white dust, relics of forgotten technology. Then, among the debris, a silhouette. Human-shaped, but unmistakably wrong. It lay curled on its side as though frozen mid-slumber, awaiting a dawn that would never come to this moon. Aurochs nudged the figure with the tip of his boot. Dust rose and drifted lazily in the still air. “It is human... but not,” Joson’s voice broke the silence, his tone neutral yet laced with curiosity. Kneeling, Joson took a cloth from his pouch—a shimmering fabric that caught the faint light—and wiped away the dust. The skull beneath was not organic, not even close. Where bone should have been, there was dark, pitted metal, weathered by centuries of decay. In places, a dull chrome-blue sheen hinted at what once must have been pristine, untouched by time or entropy. “An artifact… this far out?” Aurochs muttered, his voice tinged with disbelief. “Seems so,” Joson replied, though there was something unsettling about the discovery. The men, tall and impossibly muscular, deep set bony visages, shared a glance. Without a trace of hair on their heads, faces or brow, the living statues were unreadable beneath their cold, pragmatic exteriors. From a simple elastic pouch on his waistband, Joson retrieved a small titanium band. Without a word, he placed it on his forehead, and it sprang to life, tiny legs extending from its edges and securing it to the grey patches embedded in his skin, a cap of gray polymer fabric expanding to cover his bare alabaster scalp secured in place. A laser flickered across his retina, and in his vision, translucent windows unfurled, glowing faintly in teal. “Trim the noise,” he commanded. Instantly, half the windows vanished. “Focus: humanoid.” Data cascaded across the primary display. A 3D model of the figure beneath him rotated slowly, feeding lines of information into his mind. The analysis was swift: titanium, silicon, aluminum, polymers, tungsten. More interesting still—graphenex alloys, ferrofluid residues. This was no simple machine. “Not just any artifact,” Aurochs murmured, donning his own visorband. The glowing screens reflected in his eyes. “Artifact classification: golem,” Joson said aloud, though both knew what they were looking at. Aurochs crouched next to him, scrutinizing the form. “It’s small… weak. Not built for combat.” His brow furrowed. “A sentry?” Joson’s hand traced the curve of the figure’s chest, brushing away more dust and fragments of what was once a suit, revealing the contours beneath. There was no traditional skeleton, only a support frame that hinted at a distinctly feminine form. And there, atop the head, the remnants of hair—fragile strands that had somehow survived the ravages of time. “Not a sentry,” Joson’s voice was low. “A consort.” “A consort?” Aurochs echoed, the word foreign to him. He glanced at the machine again, as though seeing it anew. “Why so delicate?” Joson’s gaze remained on the figure. “Do you recall the historical archives? From before… Man as we know him?” Aurochs’s lips twitched into a rare smirk. “Wo-man,” he pronounced, the syllables rolling awkwardly off his tongue, followed by a dry, humorless chuckle. The noise was uncannily deep, unsettling, devoid of warmth. The two stood in silence for a moment, the wind howling faintly outside the ruins. Joson’s visor flashed with new data. “Beginning data retrieval,” he muttered, ignoring Aurochs’s disapproving glance. “Heresy,” Aurochs hissed, his tone sharp. Joson chuckled darkly. “Valuable data” he countered dryly, but continued. “Data dump in progress.” The visor filled with streams of ancient code and broken memories. The ruins seemed to groan in protest, as though the very act of retrieving this information was a violation of the dead world’s silence. Then, something shifted. Joson froze. “Wait…” Aurochs straightened. “Problem?” Joson hesitated. “Negative. Just a glitch.” He shrugged, though his expression betrayed unease. Unseen by either of them, a faint red glow flickered behind the dust-coated eye of the machine. A spark of life, a whisper from the past. The light flared briefly, casting long shadows against the cracked walls—then faded again, swallowed by the eternal twilight of the gas giant's shine. Song: Under the Silence(2006, lyrics by Xara) : ( >>45333 ) Hope I got the formatting about right, Meta Ronin.
Edited last time by Chobitsu on 09/24/2026 (Thu) 21:03:20.
>>45334 Shit that was supposed to be 2026, I'll need to fix that on the post
>>45335 I'll change that to 2026, Meta Ronin.

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